From Martin Luther King, Jr. to Gandhi, Bill Gates to Barack Obama, Oprah Winfrey to St Theresa…One thing these names all have in common and you would agree if you know them or of their works is Charisma.
What is charisma you ask?
Charisma is that compelling attractiveness or charm that an individual has that can inspire devotion in others. To be a good leader, some argue that you have to be Charismatic to inspire your followers.
While it is widely believed that you have to be born highly charismatic. It has been proven that charisma isn’t necessarily an innate talent – you are not born with it. It is a skill that is learnable
Is charisma only for those who are perfect?
This is another common misconception that highly charismatic people are perfect. As such, charisma comes from being superior and having a high amount of specialization(in a field) or oratory skills, Making lots and lots of money, or being as beautiful as Rihanna or that guy from Bridgerton.
However, due to something known as the vulnerability effect, studies have shown that Real charisma comes from being authentic, vulnerable, and honest.
Why you want to be charismatic
Leaders have to be charismatic to sell their vision and inspire devotions in followers to make it work, so why should you be charismatic if you are not a leader
Because of the one thing you have in common with every leader that has been and would be – Selling.
In this world, You and I are constantly selling – Goods, services, or ourselves. One skill every good salesperson you have ever dealt with has is – you seem to like them. You might not know why but there is always something around them. How about people whose company you enjoy? What is that magnetic quality that drags you to them…Charisma=
Being Charismatic can also help improve your confidence in yourself.
7 Ways to Develop Charisma`
That said, these tips we are about to share with you is supposed to help you become the best charismatic version of yourself.
They talk and talk and talk and you just have to listen?.. What happens? Do you enjoy it?.
Most people want to be heard and understood and by being someone who listens and takes interest in people, you develop a likeability factor that makes you more attractive.
By listening and being interested in what someone else is sharing with you, you are showing care and while you might not know it, it means the world to the other party…So while it is good to talk about your interests, also pay close attention to others when they share theirs with you. It shows hearts and charisma requires lots and lots of heart
2. Focus on people and give them your attention: There is always something interesting going on, on our phones. Every minute we’re not on it, we are in danger of losing out on something important… But is that really true?
Remember when you’re asleep, you’d still get notifications and a whole lot of things happen that you’d miss on a daily basis. If that is the case, giving someone your full attention is great when you are being spoken to. Always make people feel seen, heard, and understood. Be present.
3. Make Eye Contact: This is one little skill that not only helps you develop charisma but builds up your self-confidence. When talking to someone, try maintaining as much eye contact as possible and stop looking at the floor or your shoes(or your phones). Just don’t make it too long and creepy. There should be a healthy balance between what you do (eye contact) and looking everywhere else.
4. Model people’s body language: Charisma is all about connecting with someone else. Learning to model people’s body movements helps you seem more likable. Remember, you are still being you, just more likable – Connecting. Think of those you like, they are usually people who are more like you than not. There should be a reason for that. You are both connected by shared similarities
5. Don’t focus on responses: Don’t be in a rush to respond when you have been spoken to. There is a common saying that most people only wait for you to pause so they can speak. It is even worse when you get in the habit of cutting people off when they are still talking – no one likes that.
Taking time to understand what you want to say before you say it is as important as listening to someone. Taking a 2-second pause to process what you want to say before you speak allows the other party to “land”. Think of Barack Obama, Those pauses in his speech seem to make them more powerful. Practice the art of the pause.
6. Use of tonality: The tone which you use to speak can show how charismatic you are and you should be intentional in modelling a tone that suits you. You can be warm, friendly, Firm, or hilarious with your tone of voice. Learning to switch to what the situation calls for can help you improve your charisma. One way to practice your tone and perfect it is by slowing down your speech. You can also learn from watching other charismatic people and how they speak and carry themselves in specific situations then picture yourself doing so yourself.
7. Visualize yourself in charismatic situations: A study was carried out at the University of Chicago, where participants were divided into 3 groups.
These 3 groups were made to do a set of free throws and see how many of them made baskets.
After their scores had been tallied they were told to do a different form of “practice” each day for 30 minutes for 30 days.
Group A, came to the basketball court and practiced their free throws for 30 minutes each day, Group B came to the court and “visualized” making free throws for 30 minutes each day and Group C did no practice at all.
At the end of the 30 day period, They were all told to make free throws to see if there was any improvement.
Group A – who had practiced with balls for 30 minutes improved 24%,
Group B that “visualized” doing free throws improved an amazing 23% and Group C that did nothing at all improved 0%.
By visualizing yourself being charismatic, you are improving and it is easier to be charismatic when you are in a situation that requires you to be.
Have an awesomely charismatic month ahead.